Grief

2014 hopes, dreams and good things.

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I know that without bad I will not have a measure of good. The year 2013 brought about many bad moments with the good lessons being woven in. I am so glad that I kept a journal because at the end of the year I could look at where I was and what I hoped ; and compare it to the end of the year. I used it to identify the accomplishments or disappointments that I had.

I can see how throughout the year I was being guided by God to be able to face the next task at hand. I wrote down my prayers and feel that writing them out by hand helped breathe life into them.

This morning I woke up did Reiki self-treatment, and then meditated over a cup of coffee. This is my favorite thing to do. I practice focusing on the moment that I am drinking the coffee. Everything is still going on around me but I am oblivious. I think God provides us with those meditative moments to heal. Our bodies are made to heal themselves, no matter how many products a man will invent to speed up the process the only thing that can really enhance the healing in my view is Reiki Attunements.

I had severe arthritis due to the death of my mother, that in the month of February 2013 I was in physical distress. I was only able to discover this by keeping my journal. I vowed at the end of 2012 to keep a journal at least one page for every day. Well i have three journals that is right three of them. Of course getting the written word onto the computer and in the edit is another story. So my blog may be bleak for a bit. Because transcribing my work into the digital world could prove arduous on this healing body. I never realized the energy that would be coursing through my body. I should be at an excellent typing speed by the end of it. I had no idea the obstacles that would present themselves throughout the year but I feel each one made me strong enough to be where I am.

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Some Days…

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Some days the thoughts are heavier than others. Today is one of those days, full.

Full seems like the best way to describe it, I feel full of something the descriptive word is not yet realized by me to describe it. I am mad and glad all at the same time sometimes glad at being mad.

I feel courageous and nervous and they are happening simultaneously.  I feel one great awaking after another. I’ve been reading my own Tarot, probably should be a warning. Asking all the questions that months ago may have predicted my present situation. I have decided to read more about it.

I have a crystal that I have cleared with Reiki and charged with Reiki and the Full Moon Cycle. It really does add another dimension to my Reiki sessions. I am trying to remain focused and optimistic but my moods have been so dramatic as of late. I some times wonder if my clothing choices have something to do with it. I have so many solid colored shirts and black or gray slacks. Is it because of my Aura intuition?

 I have been happiest when I wear a combination of colors, one particular sweater being among them. I wore it on my 40th birthday, then the move happened and now we are here. My mom was alive the last time I wore that sweater, it is so surreal to realize that. She hugged me that day.

Change has been all around me and when I tell myself to slow down some spiritual growth occurs during the slow down process. I never could have prepared for the grief.